GALIT AKO SA PASKO ( BLAME BEMBOL ROCO )

      1970's and one of the biggest discovery of the decade was Bembol Roco who played the role of Julio Madriaga  in the movie   " Maynila :  Sa Kuko ng Liwanag ". So convincing was his acting that I shifted a bit to watching Filipino dramas from the usual FPJ starers and other action movies. I also came to appreciate other Lino Brocka movies as well as those directed by Danny Zialcita and Romy Suzara. Movies cost only php 2.25 those days so I got to watch at least 3 movies every week from my php 5.00 allowance. Bembol Roco was added to my list of starers that I should not miss especially after he made " Boy Pana ".

       But one of his roles that really got into me was about a disturbed young man who in his moment of anger and sadness destroyed the Christmas toys and decors displayed in the sidewalks. He was then arrested and brought to a police station where he poured out his sentiments on why he hated Christmas. He complained about how Christmas have turned into a charade where the rich pretend to have some compassion for the poor, giving them gifts and talking about charity and spreading goodwill on Christmas day. Yet once Yuletide  season is over, they go back to their real self - taking advantage and looking down on people who work for them. I am not sure what TV program that was, maybe " Sanyugto ", but I will never forget the way he explained himself to the police officer who apprehended him. He was then released for it was Christmas eve and the officer so touched by his frustrations that he gave Bembol a pack of cigarette and pancit to bring home to his family.

       A very simple TV show but it surely changed my view of Christmas. Surely Jesus never intended to have these kind of festivities when He was born in a manger the day we now called Christmas. God was sending us a different message but the traders have another thing in mind - business and profit. The solemn day was turned into festival of sort where hypocrites pretend to be what they are not, families try to mend fences but forget about loving each other once the yuletide season is over. Being happy on Christmas day have been a topic of many movies and almost all people pretend to wear happy faces.

       I happen to have 5 kids, born and separated by just a year of  age, and we were so damned poor during their pre-school days. I could not afford to cook something special on Christmas eve so we regarded Christmas as just another day and another night. No expectations, no disappointment - that's our motto. Each day is special and don't need any so called occasion to brighten our day. We played games everyday and I told them new stories each time that they set aside their gadgets each time I'm home.  Kids love  my presence more than any present I would bring home and as long as their mother was with them, there were no dry moments. They were used to not having parties on their birthdays as well and the extra special day for each and everyone of us is when I bring home some good food we could share on the table.

       Even to this day, we look back at those past 20 years not as years to be forgotten but years to reminiscent how we shared the little we had. We still are not better off but in one more year, all my kids except the youngest will have their own jobs, and the old, dry days will but be memories of despite the difficulties we were able to fill our home with laughter. Christmas for us could be any day, any time ...