In the movie " The Bridge of Spies " Tom Hanks was surprised by his client's remark after he said that he could face death penalty for espionage - will worrying help ? The odds are all stacked up against him but he knows that he could not do anything other than waiting for the wheels of justice to grind, so why worry.
In another Clark Gable movie whose title I could no longer remember, there's also a submarine scene where Gable asked a shipmate how come he's so cool while the enemy is detonating bombs. I remember him saying - " well, if the bombs are dropped far enough not to do any damage then we have nothing to worry about. But if the bomb is detonated near enough then it can damage the submarine so we have to check how bad the damage is. If the damage could be repaired then we have nothing to worry about. However if its a direct hit, the damage would sink us to the bottom and we have to worry if we could still get out before we're trapped inside. If we're trapped then we have nothing more to worry about 'cause we'll gonna die anyway. So what is there to worry about ? "
But the Hakuna Matata scene in the animated movie - " The Lion King " tops them all. When the world turn its back on you you turn your back against the world. The worry free philosophy actually is taught in almost all religion including Christianity. The Bible quoted that " the birds, they neither sow nor harvest but they are provided for by the Lord. What more us men for God love us more. And could life be prolonged by worrying ? " The other oriental beliefs teaches that we should always do our best, and then allow nature to take its own course. All of them teaches that death is not the end of everything but merely a beginning of a new life in another world.
Bob Hope said that there are 3 kinds of people. First are people who make things happen. Second are the people who watch things happen. And third are the people who ask " what happened ? ". Some narrowed it down to two types - those who take charge and those who are taken advantage of. But no matter how you see people, or how you view life, you can' waste your life away worrying about the bad things that may happen. Most of them doesn't happen anyway - and suppose they do happen, you have no choice but to deal with them. So why worry ?
Friday, September 9, 2016
Thursday, September 8, 2016
XIV. WHICH IS IT ? YOUR PROBLEM OR HIS PROBLEM ?
One of the usual cause of stress is because we worry too much. Most often we are stressed by other people's problem because we can't even distinguish which is which, our problem or other people's problem. A very good example is when we try to please other people by trying to be what they want us to be. But its actually their problem if they can't like you the way you are for you are just being you, so its actually their problem if they don't like you. If it so happen that you share some space with them, some chores with them, or some work with, be your self and let them handle the stress.
Parents usually are the most guilty about this things - they think you are the extension of their dreams. They think that since you are their children you should be thankful that you were given life and that you are obliged to follow their will on what to do with your life. Yet there are times when what they want is not what you want so you ran into conflict and at times made to feel the guilt of disobeying their wishes. In reality if they can't learn to let you go then that's their problem and not your problem. We only came through them and not from them - its God who decides who we should be, who our parents would be, what place and time, practically everything - so its not really our problem who and what we should really be. Life is just like connecting the dots, the last dot will define what kind of life we have lived. We just have to seek our own destiny.
I am not telling you guys that we should be bullheaded or we should disobey our parents. We should love and respect them, honor them for their sacrifices. But if it would mean living our life for them instead of our own, then we are not doing what we are destined to be. There are many ways of repaying them but being an extension of their dreams is certainly not one of them. To be in a life of not your own design is like being in prison with strings attached to move the way the puppet-master weave. Tell me, what would have become of Manny Pacquiao had he followed the wishes of her mother ? In his own words, maybe just a fisherman or a farmer or a bum living in the streets.
So the next time around try and figure out whose problem is it. If you love someone but she doesn't love you back and gets irritated when you ogle and follow her around, then that's her problem not yours. You just love loving her, if things doesn't work out just continue what you're doing until you find another love - she might even miss you when you're no longer around and again that's her problem. You can't understand what your teacher is teaching you, you tried but you just can't, then that's your teacher's problem 'cause maybe he's a lousy teacher. He should find ways to go down to your level and start from your level of understanding. If things still can't work out, then you can shift course or study other things. Remember, all the teachers of Albert Einstein in grade school thought he was stupid and hopeless but now the world remember Einstein and no one gives a damn what happened to his teachers.
If you can't understand your wife, then that's not a problem. Nobody really understand a woman - thousands of years have passed, but you still have to find one good analyst who can figure out what really goes inside a woman's mind. If you love your woman then she'll love you back so where's the problem. If your kids can't understand you, and you can't understand them, that's not really a problem. Families becomes real families when they solve problems together - as long as you do things because you love them, they will soon figure out what you are trying to do - just have faith, move on and wait. God will take of the rest so where's the problem ?
You're working hard but still you can't get out of the slump, still buried in debt, and people look down on you for being a failure - but come to think of it, what really is the problem ? You're alive, you enjoy life with your wife and kids, and the kids are doing fine and will soon graduate and have a life of their own. The problem is that your brothers and sisters who are living a secured life are disappointed with you, so with your parents. Your a pain-in-the-ass and at times a parasite to them, but you know that there are times when you just run out of alternative and have to ask for their help in order to get things through. So they say they worry about you but sometimes words meant to advise hurt because indeed you are what they say you are. But is that really a problem ? You feel hurt but those words were really meant to hurt to wake you up about the situation you're in. You only hope that maybe if they'd only understand the situation they would have said those things. Just stop fooling your self, the money they gave to help you was hard-earned and were meant for them, - you caused them a problem and you have to take the hurt. You thanked them with all you heart but they still aren't convinced, so it no longer becomes your problem if they can't feel your sincerity.
The point I am trying to make is that there really is no problem that truly exist in this world. There are problems but there are also real problems - but once you are able able to connect your self with your God there is no problem, only test of will and test of faith that will only give you the clues on which dots comes next. I am at a lost on how to explain the things I wanted to say - you need to experience how it is -to be on the ropes receiving all the blows directed on you and survive to fight another round. That's when the real excitement begins ...
Parents usually are the most guilty about this things - they think you are the extension of their dreams. They think that since you are their children you should be thankful that you were given life and that you are obliged to follow their will on what to do with your life. Yet there are times when what they want is not what you want so you ran into conflict and at times made to feel the guilt of disobeying their wishes. In reality if they can't learn to let you go then that's their problem and not your problem. We only came through them and not from them - its God who decides who we should be, who our parents would be, what place and time, practically everything - so its not really our problem who and what we should really be. Life is just like connecting the dots, the last dot will define what kind of life we have lived. We just have to seek our own destiny.
I am not telling you guys that we should be bullheaded or we should disobey our parents. We should love and respect them, honor them for their sacrifices. But if it would mean living our life for them instead of our own, then we are not doing what we are destined to be. There are many ways of repaying them but being an extension of their dreams is certainly not one of them. To be in a life of not your own design is like being in prison with strings attached to move the way the puppet-master weave. Tell me, what would have become of Manny Pacquiao had he followed the wishes of her mother ? In his own words, maybe just a fisherman or a farmer or a bum living in the streets.
So the next time around try and figure out whose problem is it. If you love someone but she doesn't love you back and gets irritated when you ogle and follow her around, then that's her problem not yours. You just love loving her, if things doesn't work out just continue what you're doing until you find another love - she might even miss you when you're no longer around and again that's her problem. You can't understand what your teacher is teaching you, you tried but you just can't, then that's your teacher's problem 'cause maybe he's a lousy teacher. He should find ways to go down to your level and start from your level of understanding. If things still can't work out, then you can shift course or study other things. Remember, all the teachers of Albert Einstein in grade school thought he was stupid and hopeless but now the world remember Einstein and no one gives a damn what happened to his teachers.
If you can't understand your wife, then that's not a problem. Nobody really understand a woman - thousands of years have passed, but you still have to find one good analyst who can figure out what really goes inside a woman's mind. If you love your woman then she'll love you back so where's the problem. If your kids can't understand you, and you can't understand them, that's not really a problem. Families becomes real families when they solve problems together - as long as you do things because you love them, they will soon figure out what you are trying to do - just have faith, move on and wait. God will take of the rest so where's the problem ?
You're working hard but still you can't get out of the slump, still buried in debt, and people look down on you for being a failure - but come to think of it, what really is the problem ? You're alive, you enjoy life with your wife and kids, and the kids are doing fine and will soon graduate and have a life of their own. The problem is that your brothers and sisters who are living a secured life are disappointed with you, so with your parents. Your a pain-in-the-ass and at times a parasite to them, but you know that there are times when you just run out of alternative and have to ask for their help in order to get things through. So they say they worry about you but sometimes words meant to advise hurt because indeed you are what they say you are. But is that really a problem ? You feel hurt but those words were really meant to hurt to wake you up about the situation you're in. You only hope that maybe if they'd only understand the situation they would have said those things. Just stop fooling your self, the money they gave to help you was hard-earned and were meant for them, - you caused them a problem and you have to take the hurt. You thanked them with all you heart but they still aren't convinced, so it no longer becomes your problem if they can't feel your sincerity.
The point I am trying to make is that there really is no problem that truly exist in this world. There are problems but there are also real problems - but once you are able able to connect your self with your God there is no problem, only test of will and test of faith that will only give you the clues on which dots comes next. I am at a lost on how to explain the things I wanted to say - you need to experience how it is -to be on the ropes receiving all the blows directed on you and survive to fight another round. That's when the real excitement begins ...
Wednesday, September 7, 2016
XIII. IT'S OKAY IF YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING ...he
THE OLD MAN IN THE RIVER
One day a young went fishing. He has all the top of the line fishing equiptments
and picked a good spot to throw his fishing hook. A few moments later an old man came down by the river, started to look around for a good spot and started fishing under the shade of tree. Three hours and the old man had a basket full of fish while the young have only caught a few. Sundown came and the young man decided to call it a day with only a handful of fish to bring home.
A week later the young man came earlier and occupied the spot where the old man sat a week ago and started to fish. An hour later the old man came, again looked around and picked a spot near a big rock. Sundown came and the old man again had a basket full of catch while the young could only come up with half a dozen fish. He wondered why and resolved to ask the old man next time how he was able to come up with a better catch.
The next week when the old man came down the river he politely asked the old man how come he always catch more fish despite having inferior fishing rod. The old man smiled and said - " That's because you came here looking for the fish. Me before I pick a spot I look for the birds. They have keener eyes than we do and they can clearly beneath the waters where the fishes stays. "
The moral lesson of the story is that if you want answers, try asking the people who have a keener knowledge of the topic. It's okay if you don't if you don't know everything, it doesn't make you less of a man if you go down your high horse and start asking for direction so you wouldn't lose your way.
This reminded me of another story of another blond girl who bought several books on how to go ice fishing. Thinking that she knew everything there is to know she bought all the equipments needed to go ice fishing. The next week she picked a spot, and was about to dig through the ice when she heard a voice - "These is no fish under the ice "
She packed up and picked another spot and again about to break the ice when again she heard a voice - " There is no fish under the ice ". She decided to try again but again she heard the voice so she asked - " Is that you, Lord ? ". Again she heard the voice, " No I am not the Lord. I am the maintenance man and you're in a skating rink ! "
One day a young went fishing. He has all the top of the line fishing equiptments
and picked a good spot to throw his fishing hook. A few moments later an old man came down by the river, started to look around for a good spot and started fishing under the shade of tree. Three hours and the old man had a basket full of fish while the young have only caught a few. Sundown came and the young man decided to call it a day with only a handful of fish to bring home.
A week later the young man came earlier and occupied the spot where the old man sat a week ago and started to fish. An hour later the old man came, again looked around and picked a spot near a big rock. Sundown came and the old man again had a basket full of catch while the young could only come up with half a dozen fish. He wondered why and resolved to ask the old man next time how he was able to come up with a better catch.
The next week when the old man came down the river he politely asked the old man how come he always catch more fish despite having inferior fishing rod. The old man smiled and said - " That's because you came here looking for the fish. Me before I pick a spot I look for the birds. They have keener eyes than we do and they can clearly beneath the waters where the fishes stays. "
The moral lesson of the story is that if you want answers, try asking the people who have a keener knowledge of the topic. It's okay if you don't if you don't know everything, it doesn't make you less of a man if you go down your high horse and start asking for direction so you wouldn't lose your way.
This reminded me of another story of another blond girl who bought several books on how to go ice fishing. Thinking that she knew everything there is to know she bought all the equipments needed to go ice fishing. The next week she picked a spot, and was about to dig through the ice when she heard a voice - "These is no fish under the ice "
She packed up and picked another spot and again about to break the ice when again she heard a voice - " There is no fish under the ice ". She decided to try again but again she heard the voice so she asked - " Is that you, Lord ? ". Again she heard the voice, " No I am not the Lord. I am the maintenance man and you're in a skating rink ! "
XII. WHAT RIGHT HAVE I TO GIVE ADVICE ?
" Screw you, Creepo ! "
I remember this line very well as Little Marie shouted to Rocky after he escorted her home and gave her a lecture about getting herself into trouble. Each time I am tempted to share a piece of my mind to someone, I hold back 'cause with me on the dump what right have I to dish out some advice ? A failure for most people I knew believed that I wasted a lot of opportunities. Can't blame them but I surely wished they knew the real story.
But that's water under the bridge right now, can't spend the rest of my life trying to explain myself to them. That's the reality of life, its all about how other people sees you and how you see yourself. If you can't hold on to your old life, you might as well let go and find another scenario where you can build a new you. You can never do that unless you are willing to cut ties with people who are looking down on you, and move on. That's the easy part. The harder part is getting up and moving forward.
Rocky inspired me a lot. I picked a lot of lessons from his life and from his creator, Sylvester Stallone. A lot of people doesn't know that he wrote almost all the screenplays of his movies aside from the Rocky series. His life was not perfect but he earned the right to teach the world his philosophical views from the movies he made. That Little Marie turned up as his love interest in the last Rocky movie entitled Creed.
We don't have to be old to be wise. The world today is moving so fast that knowledge lies at the end of one's fingertips. In our times we have to go to the library and research for it - now they just "google" it. It was simpler then but I don't agree that things were better then. The older generation just want to call it the good old days because they were young then. Things are better now - we the older generation just can't keep up with the times so we try to convince ourselves we've had more fun.
So getting back to the question - what right have I to give out advice ? Freddie Roach was a failure as a boxer. He tried his best to become a champion but he just don't have what it takes. In his mind he knew what to do but he just couldn't dish it out no matter how hard he tried. He never lacked the desire, the persistence, that later he admitted that he quit the fight game 5 fights too late. The punishment he took in those 5 fights may have caused his present ailment but it turned out to a blessing in disguise. He emerged from the experience a better man, spiritually and turned his focus into teaching boxers the things he learned from boxing. He was destined to cross path with Manny Pacquiao who has everything he dreamed of having. All he did was to chisel off the rough edges and helped made the Pacman what he is today. Freddie's failure in the boxing arena turned out to be the key to his mastery of the game.
I am now nearing the end of my rope, learned a lot from experience and picked up a lot of lessons from the books that I have read the last 30 years or so. I still have about 700 books on my reading file and hundred of movies for viewing. Guess its about time I share some of the things I have learned...
I remember this line very well as Little Marie shouted to Rocky after he escorted her home and gave her a lecture about getting herself into trouble. Each time I am tempted to share a piece of my mind to someone, I hold back 'cause with me on the dump what right have I to dish out some advice ? A failure for most people I knew believed that I wasted a lot of opportunities. Can't blame them but I surely wished they knew the real story.
But that's water under the bridge right now, can't spend the rest of my life trying to explain myself to them. That's the reality of life, its all about how other people sees you and how you see yourself. If you can't hold on to your old life, you might as well let go and find another scenario where you can build a new you. You can never do that unless you are willing to cut ties with people who are looking down on you, and move on. That's the easy part. The harder part is getting up and moving forward.
Rocky inspired me a lot. I picked a lot of lessons from his life and from his creator, Sylvester Stallone. A lot of people doesn't know that he wrote almost all the screenplays of his movies aside from the Rocky series. His life was not perfect but he earned the right to teach the world his philosophical views from the movies he made. That Little Marie turned up as his love interest in the last Rocky movie entitled Creed.
We don't have to be old to be wise. The world today is moving so fast that knowledge lies at the end of one's fingertips. In our times we have to go to the library and research for it - now they just "google" it. It was simpler then but I don't agree that things were better then. The older generation just want to call it the good old days because they were young then. Things are better now - we the older generation just can't keep up with the times so we try to convince ourselves we've had more fun.
So getting back to the question - what right have I to give out advice ? Freddie Roach was a failure as a boxer. He tried his best to become a champion but he just don't have what it takes. In his mind he knew what to do but he just couldn't dish it out no matter how hard he tried. He never lacked the desire, the persistence, that later he admitted that he quit the fight game 5 fights too late. The punishment he took in those 5 fights may have caused his present ailment but it turned out to a blessing in disguise. He emerged from the experience a better man, spiritually and turned his focus into teaching boxers the things he learned from boxing. He was destined to cross path with Manny Pacquiao who has everything he dreamed of having. All he did was to chisel off the rough edges and helped made the Pacman what he is today. Freddie's failure in the boxing arena turned out to be the key to his mastery of the game.
I am now nearing the end of my rope, learned a lot from experience and picked up a lot of lessons from the books that I have read the last 30 years or so. I still have about 700 books on my reading file and hundred of movies for viewing. Guess its about time I share some of the things I have learned...
XI. ADVICE FROM A FAILURE
I could have been a successful engineer had I stayed on with my contemporaries. Most of them are now project managers or private contractors. Some have migrated abroad while some still contract workers abroad. Financially they are better off, they look fine so I guess they're all fine. Being a member of the same batch of cadet engineers in 1982, I could say that I am at par with them in terms of intelligence but maybe I was just a little short in terms of patience and persistence. The MWSS years were all but a launching pad for all of us after all the Marcos project were scrapped and the best way out was to work abroad for greener pasture.
All of them were nursing a dream of making it big someday and build the foundations of that dream. But for me, I see it as an exile away from the family that I love and the promise of dollars to be earned could not dampen the thought of not seeing my wife and my kids for years. I was married, they were not - I am having the fun of my life enjoying every moment and I just couldn't step away from all those comforts of home with a promise of better harvest. Besides, things were doing great and my little business was flourishing. Who would ever thought that they were about to end.
To make a long story short, we lost everything. It also caused me to the trust of my brothers and sisters and my parents as well for they found it more convenient for them to believe the scenario painted by my other sister. No one bothered to check the facts and uncover the truth so I have no other recourse but to detach myself from them and start building from what we have left. A great distance separate us anyway and they would be better off without me. It was a real hard climb for us and in the last 20 years we haven't even gotten back to the point where we could have our heads above water. But those 20 years was the most colorful part of our lives - you spend 20 years barely eking out a living yet managed to to squeeze in some fun along the way - the rest of the way is easy.
It is a lot easier to level down a house and build a new one than trying to rebuild a house that is about to fall down. So much had been said in those span of years and though those words were forgiven the scars remain. Its like an amputated finger, the pain is gone and healed but each you see the part where the missing finger used to be you remember the pain. My kids are lucky for they could start a new generation of their own, with them and their would be families to avoid the mistakes we made. Its not about the question of hating the past, its gone and they could learn from it, its all about painting a better picture and building better roads for the next generation.
All of them were nursing a dream of making it big someday and build the foundations of that dream. But for me, I see it as an exile away from the family that I love and the promise of dollars to be earned could not dampen the thought of not seeing my wife and my kids for years. I was married, they were not - I am having the fun of my life enjoying every moment and I just couldn't step away from all those comforts of home with a promise of better harvest. Besides, things were doing great and my little business was flourishing. Who would ever thought that they were about to end.
To make a long story short, we lost everything. It also caused me to the trust of my brothers and sisters and my parents as well for they found it more convenient for them to believe the scenario painted by my other sister. No one bothered to check the facts and uncover the truth so I have no other recourse but to detach myself from them and start building from what we have left. A great distance separate us anyway and they would be better off without me. It was a real hard climb for us and in the last 20 years we haven't even gotten back to the point where we could have our heads above water. But those 20 years was the most colorful part of our lives - you spend 20 years barely eking out a living yet managed to to squeeze in some fun along the way - the rest of the way is easy.
It is a lot easier to level down a house and build a new one than trying to rebuild a house that is about to fall down. So much had been said in those span of years and though those words were forgiven the scars remain. Its like an amputated finger, the pain is gone and healed but each you see the part where the missing finger used to be you remember the pain. My kids are lucky for they could start a new generation of their own, with them and their would be families to avoid the mistakes we made. Its not about the question of hating the past, its gone and they could learn from it, its all about painting a better picture and building better roads for the next generation.
Tuesday, September 6, 2016
X. LEARN TO LOVE YOURSELF
" Let the children's laughter remind us how we use to be "
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Take care of your self first and foremost. For God is within us and we were created in the image of God. Before we can take care of other people we must be in good health and high spirits for we could never give what we do not have. We plant the seed of happiness in other people and in return we feel the goodness we have done and we receive happiness in return.
I am not an authority to speak about this sort of things and I wouldn't want to argue with anyone if they think that what I say ain't right. It worked for me, maybe it could also work for some. Usually we have the lowliest opinion of our self and it takes another person to tell us how good we are. As the song goes " the greatest gift that anyone could give to you would be for you to see yourself the way I do. "
Loving your self is easy. You could start by trying to talk some sense into you and hope that you would listen to what you are saying. Listen to what your heart is saying - if you love someone, say it. She may not love like the way you love her but at least you'll know what she feels. Listen to what your body is telling you - you may be aching and your body is showing signs that you are not doing things right. Listen to your conscience - it tells you what is right and like a piece of muscle it becomes stronger when you exercise it more often. And most of all open your eyes to real world - you may be seeing only the things you wanted to see and neglect to see the other things the you ought to see. Once you are able to do these things you'll be able to see the cracks in your life and that's where the light comes in.
Riches to rags I may have been but I'm not done yet. If you have spent a number of years trying to squeeze out laughter from tight situations as we have the past 20 years, how can the coming years dampen my spirits. It is not for me lecture or teach how to's, but just to share things I have picked up as I viewed things from the top and got some fun even when I was sliding down. Funny it seems but as you grow older, you'll find your self laughing at the things that made you cry in the past. But most surprisingly you feel like shedding tears each time you remember the things in the past the happy moments that made you laugh. Such is the yang and the ying of life.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Take care of your self first and foremost. For God is within us and we were created in the image of God. Before we can take care of other people we must be in good health and high spirits for we could never give what we do not have. We plant the seed of happiness in other people and in return we feel the goodness we have done and we receive happiness in return.
I am not an authority to speak about this sort of things and I wouldn't want to argue with anyone if they think that what I say ain't right. It worked for me, maybe it could also work for some. Usually we have the lowliest opinion of our self and it takes another person to tell us how good we are. As the song goes " the greatest gift that anyone could give to you would be for you to see yourself the way I do. "
Loving your self is easy. You could start by trying to talk some sense into you and hope that you would listen to what you are saying. Listen to what your heart is saying - if you love someone, say it. She may not love like the way you love her but at least you'll know what she feels. Listen to what your body is telling you - you may be aching and your body is showing signs that you are not doing things right. Listen to your conscience - it tells you what is right and like a piece of muscle it becomes stronger when you exercise it more often. And most of all open your eyes to real world - you may be seeing only the things you wanted to see and neglect to see the other things the you ought to see. Once you are able to do these things you'll be able to see the cracks in your life and that's where the light comes in.
Riches to rags I may have been but I'm not done yet. If you have spent a number of years trying to squeeze out laughter from tight situations as we have the past 20 years, how can the coming years dampen my spirits. It is not for me lecture or teach how to's, but just to share things I have picked up as I viewed things from the top and got some fun even when I was sliding down. Funny it seems but as you grow older, you'll find your self laughing at the things that made you cry in the past. But most surprisingly you feel like shedding tears each time you remember the things in the past the happy moments that made you laugh. Such is the yang and the ying of life.
Monday, September 5, 2016
IX . SIMPLIFY ... DON'T SWEAT OVER SMALL STUFF
How do you fill up your life ? I heard a good story once circulated by a beer brand and it goes like this :
A guy once asked a golfing buddy how he sees life since he seem to be always in a happy mood. The guy emptied the glass pitcher infront of them and filled the pitcher with golf balls. Then he asked his friend if he thinks the pitcher is full. The guy said yes then he explained - yes it is but there are still some room as he filled the pitcher with marbles.
Again he asked if the guy thinks it is full and after the guy said yes he filled the voids with sand. The guy then said - " now I guess the pitcher is full ". His friend smiled and then poured in a bottle of beer until the pitcher overflowed. Then he said to the guy, now it is full, so then he explained :
The pitcher represents our life. The golf balls are the big things or as we say the most important things in our life - our faith, our family, our home, our friends, our career. These are the first things we have to deal with yet after all these are taken care there are still room for other smaller things as the marbles represent - our hobbies, our tasks at work, our relationships with other people. But still like the sands represent there are still plenty of room for other small things that we usually don't pay much attention to - movies, books, sharing stories, and other small stuffs. And yet besides all these, even when you think that you have accomplished a lot there is still room to enjoy yourself - just as the beer represent. A simple life is its own reward - piece by piece we take stone away so that the mountain that we once feared will be nothing more but a hill.
Life is similar to computer programming - if we want a good life as an output we should chop it down to its simplest component by going back to the very beginning. Once we know what makes a good life, we then come up with a plan or a flow chart on how to be able to produce our anticipated result. Its always a go or no go, if go then go to the next step if no go then do another step. Once you have come up with the output, then we debug to see if there are still things you can improve. You don't stop, you start with love then you go on loving until the very end - don't pay attention to other program that comes up with the same result, that's okay. You don't burn a neighbor's house to make your house look good. Your method may become obsolete to some but the older ways, the older language, as lesser programmers are use to it will be harder to hack.
Its okay if others have better tools, better methods, better machines, its how you use things that gives it its shining value. That's the reason why antiques are priced higher than new ones - its the history behind it that gives it its real value.
A guy once asked a golfing buddy how he sees life since he seem to be always in a happy mood. The guy emptied the glass pitcher infront of them and filled the pitcher with golf balls. Then he asked his friend if he thinks the pitcher is full. The guy said yes then he explained - yes it is but there are still some room as he filled the pitcher with marbles.
Again he asked if the guy thinks it is full and after the guy said yes he filled the voids with sand. The guy then said - " now I guess the pitcher is full ". His friend smiled and then poured in a bottle of beer until the pitcher overflowed. Then he said to the guy, now it is full, so then he explained :
The pitcher represents our life. The golf balls are the big things or as we say the most important things in our life - our faith, our family, our home, our friends, our career. These are the first things we have to deal with yet after all these are taken care there are still room for other smaller things as the marbles represent - our hobbies, our tasks at work, our relationships with other people. But still like the sands represent there are still plenty of room for other small things that we usually don't pay much attention to - movies, books, sharing stories, and other small stuffs. And yet besides all these, even when you think that you have accomplished a lot there is still room to enjoy yourself - just as the beer represent. A simple life is its own reward - piece by piece we take stone away so that the mountain that we once feared will be nothing more but a hill.
Life is similar to computer programming - if we want a good life as an output we should chop it down to its simplest component by going back to the very beginning. Once we know what makes a good life, we then come up with a plan or a flow chart on how to be able to produce our anticipated result. Its always a go or no go, if go then go to the next step if no go then do another step. Once you have come up with the output, then we debug to see if there are still things you can improve. You don't stop, you start with love then you go on loving until the very end - don't pay attention to other program that comes up with the same result, that's okay. You don't burn a neighbor's house to make your house look good. Your method may become obsolete to some but the older ways, the older language, as lesser programmers are use to it will be harder to hack.
Its okay if others have better tools, better methods, better machines, its how you use things that gives it its shining value. That's the reason why antiques are priced higher than new ones - its the history behind it that gives it its real value.
VIII. RAGS TO RICHES ...RICHES TO RAGS ...BUT I'M NOT DONE YET
I enjoyed life when I was young ...spoiled by my grandparents. Elementary days was very memorable so was my high school years though not as good. Then 2 exciting years as a factory worker before my college days - still the best years of my young life. Ten years at MWSS was an excursion and married life ... not so prosperous, slid down to almost zero but even if I have the power to go back and change our past I wouldn't touch a thing. We lost our way, fell downhill and lost everything we've worked for but it only strengthened the bond not only between me and my wife but with our kids. Its not really something to brag about but we managed to have a home, always lacking the basic essentials yet filled with laughter and good memories.
We moved around a lot after we got kicked out of my parent's old residence when it was sold. 12 times, until we finally found a good apartment 10 years ago. Our kids never knew Christmas and New Year like other families. For to us they were just but another day and another night. No birthday parties either for we were so financially drained that our worries were more about what we need one day at a time. The cause for celebration were the occasional "lucky" days when we could afford to buy meat for a good meal. And Christmas is when we receive Balikbayan package from my parents and other relatives abroad. In between we have to fill up the gaps with good movies, watched them together and do some storytelling. In my book, those were the finest performances I did infront of 6 adoring audiences. It was me against the TV set, their cellphones and play stations and I always win. My wife took care of everything in between, most especially the laugh-in parts and post-performance commentaries. We may have failed in a lot of things, unable to provide good food for their stomachs but at least we were able to hit their hearts.
What we lacked financially, Len and I worked to bridge the gap through being always there one hundred percent of the time. The kids created their own world but they always look back to see if we are within shouting distance - kids value more your presence than presents. Never did they got used to expect " pasalubong " each time we came from work and contented themselves of having us watched cartoons and classic movies until midnight. While other kids came to know Justin Bieber and Britney Spears, our kids enjoyed the likes of Doris Day, Julie Andrews, Gene Kelly and Jacky Chan classics. We solved Math problems together and tried-out artworks we saw on TV. The corny jokes and " kantiyawan " became a family tradition. Our world was different ...
Sometimes I wonder why people seem to find it difficult to make a happy home. I guess most of them have been too serious about making a living, fulfilling their dreams that they forget about enjoying the time they have. Kids grow up so fast that you have to be there in their early life - the time when they still adore and idolize you and take you seriously. I think we parents should be there to walk with them, have fun with them, play with them, and not take them as an extension of our dreams. I may be wrong, but one thing I am sure of is they will always have a room for me in their memories. I worked hard and tried to provide them a good life. I might have failed on that part but I am not done yet. Now that they are one by one building their own life, their own world, I have more time for myself, and get back to building another life for me and my wife.
As the saying goes - I have move a little bit faster since I have less time left.
We moved around a lot after we got kicked out of my parent's old residence when it was sold. 12 times, until we finally found a good apartment 10 years ago. Our kids never knew Christmas and New Year like other families. For to us they were just but another day and another night. No birthday parties either for we were so financially drained that our worries were more about what we need one day at a time. The cause for celebration were the occasional "lucky" days when we could afford to buy meat for a good meal. And Christmas is when we receive Balikbayan package from my parents and other relatives abroad. In between we have to fill up the gaps with good movies, watched them together and do some storytelling. In my book, those were the finest performances I did infront of 6 adoring audiences. It was me against the TV set, their cellphones and play stations and I always win. My wife took care of everything in between, most especially the laugh-in parts and post-performance commentaries. We may have failed in a lot of things, unable to provide good food for their stomachs but at least we were able to hit their hearts.
What we lacked financially, Len and I worked to bridge the gap through being always there one hundred percent of the time. The kids created their own world but they always look back to see if we are within shouting distance - kids value more your presence than presents. Never did they got used to expect " pasalubong " each time we came from work and contented themselves of having us watched cartoons and classic movies until midnight. While other kids came to know Justin Bieber and Britney Spears, our kids enjoyed the likes of Doris Day, Julie Andrews, Gene Kelly and Jacky Chan classics. We solved Math problems together and tried-out artworks we saw on TV. The corny jokes and " kantiyawan " became a family tradition. Our world was different ...
Sometimes I wonder why people seem to find it difficult to make a happy home. I guess most of them have been too serious about making a living, fulfilling their dreams that they forget about enjoying the time they have. Kids grow up so fast that you have to be there in their early life - the time when they still adore and idolize you and take you seriously. I think we parents should be there to walk with them, have fun with them, play with them, and not take them as an extension of our dreams. I may be wrong, but one thing I am sure of is they will always have a room for me in their memories. I worked hard and tried to provide them a good life. I might have failed on that part but I am not done yet. Now that they are one by one building their own life, their own world, I have more time for myself, and get back to building another life for me and my wife.
As the saying goes - I have move a little bit faster since I have less time left.
Saturday, September 3, 2016
VII. LOVE IS ALL THAT MATTERS
We may not have a mansion on the hill
Mink coats and diamonds by the score
But the things we have no one could ever take it
Just the two of us no need to ask for more ...
I guess this the trick. Fall in love and forget about everything ... love sincerely and everything will fall into their proper places. The road to happiness with not be a smooth ride, there will be problems, there will be pains and some misunderstandings, but sooner or later love will prevail. Just try not to figure out the "why" and the "what" questions, whether you do something wrong or forgot to do something that ought to be done, it doesn't really matter in the end as long as you trust each other. Someone who loves sincerely doesn't mean to hurt or do harm - love means you never have to say you're sorry.
Lovers see only the rosy part of life. They see hope when things are falling apart.
They are the "you and me against the world" type and tightly hold on to each other even when everything around is breaking apart. Kind'a stupid, crazy even, but its how love is truly tested ...and its even harder to explain. We only have words to express our feelings but they are not enough - only two hearts in love with each other feels and understand.
Mink coats and diamonds by the score
But the things we have no one could ever take it
Just the two of us no need to ask for more ...
I guess this the trick. Fall in love and forget about everything ... love sincerely and everything will fall into their proper places. The road to happiness with not be a smooth ride, there will be problems, there will be pains and some misunderstandings, but sooner or later love will prevail. Just try not to figure out the "why" and the "what" questions, whether you do something wrong or forgot to do something that ought to be done, it doesn't really matter in the end as long as you trust each other. Someone who loves sincerely doesn't mean to hurt or do harm - love means you never have to say you're sorry.
Lovers see only the rosy part of life. They see hope when things are falling apart.
They are the "you and me against the world" type and tightly hold on to each other even when everything around is breaking apart. Kind'a stupid, crazy even, but its how love is truly tested ...and its even harder to explain. We only have words to express our feelings but they are not enough - only two hearts in love with each other feels and understand.
Thursday, September 1, 2016
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