Friday, April 28, 2017
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
XXXIX. THE POWER OF WORDS
" If a thief takes my money and I take it back, does that
make me a thief ? "
Just a simple question but it changed the course of destiny. What was suppose to be a hanging party for Adolf Hitler turned out to be his greatest opportunity to rally his supporters and gained new admirers as he defended himself on the charges of treason. His rise to power was probably the greatest in modern history being only a simple soldier whose sense of nationalism blended with rhetorics hypnotized the entire German nation to seek world domination. His words, his speeches, his leadership, wrote the bloodiest page in the 20th century. Such is the power words can unleash.
The world spins around the 26 letters of the alphabet. How you arrange this letters to represent your thoughts will spell the difference of your life from that of others. Words is our only means of expressing what is going on inside our mind and our heart, but it is never really enough to picture things out the way we wanted it to seen and felt by the one we are alluding to. The way we say the words, our facial expressions, our gestures, the tone of our voice, the timing, the place, and a lot of other things can greatly affect the message we are trying to convey. What we say, how we say it, when we say it, where we say it, and to whom we say it, will make or break us. Unfortunately, not everybody is equally gifted. This is the part of our life that we have to figure out ourselves.
A sign says " You were born an original, don't die a copy". Another one says " Never change your originality for the sake of others for no one else can play your role better than you". Well I guess there is no such thing as originality, its how you say things as if it has never been said before that really counts. What you have thought of was probably been thought of before - its just the way you will use that idea that will give it its significance. Former US president Bill Clinton said that all men are 98 percent genetically the same, but we concentrate on the 2 % part that makes us different from one another. And it is that 2 percent difference that had created all the wars and conflicts that beset our history.
It took me a lot of years before I came to realize the kind of life I wanted to live. It may not be the ideal one to some, but I can honestly say that I no longer pray for the things I wanted to have. Everyday when I wake up, I thank God for the added time I could mark on my calendar. It is just that I feel time is slowly slipping by, and I must hasten things up before my failing vision and gout stricken hand could no longer type the words I wanted to leave behind. Life is fun, life is exciting, and life is designed differently for different people. Maybe our life may not be worth writing about, but given the opportunity and the tools to make something out of a simple life well-lived, I'd say why not ?
Tuesday, April 4, 2017
XXXVIII. HOW TO DEAL WITH YOUR LOSSES
George Foreman knows how it is to lose and lose badly. He guested in the 700 Club after winning the World Heavyweight Championship against Michael Moorer and what he said about losing sort of changed my views. He said that it took him ten years to admit that he lost to a better man, and it was a right hand that did him in. He was laughing when he said that, and you can very well see that he truly was a different man from what he was in 1974 Zaire fight. He knew that people won't listen to him if he preached about God when he returned to the square ring. He waited for the right moment, and what he did after knocking out Moorer, kneeling at the corner to thank God and pray, rather than raising his hands in triumph proved to the world that he really has become a man of God.
Years later, after his second retirement, he was asked how he saw his other losses and he smilingly said - they were not really losses, he just failed to knock them out. Foreman's second coming proved that you are not really a loser if you will just keep on trying. Either you come out swinging back to form or pause for a while as heal your wounds, and then recondition your self that the comeback road is a lot tougher than the first. He knew that ranged against younger and quicker opponents, he has has to double his effort, work harder and hurdle more pains in order to succeed.
Tom Hanks' role as Captain John Miller in the movie " Saving Private Ryan" summed up his losses by convincing himself that for every man he lost under his command, he was able to save some 20 or 25 of them. It was that way of thinking that allowed him to handle his own "private war."
Manny Pacquiao knew that he has to continue fighting the best in his division to be able to bounce back after getting knocked out cold by Torrecampo in 1996, and won his first world title 2 years later. But it was after his second KO loss that really boosted his career jumping 2 weight classes to win his second world title against Ledwaba. He did rested on his laurels, worked even harder, and established a record that would be hard to match winning world titles in 8 weight divisions. The big difference between him and most fighters is that he knew that getting beat up and losing is part of the game, and there is no shame in getting knocked out - for he was loved by boxing afficionados for going all out each time, taking chances, instead of fighting not to lose.
Michael Jordan failed to make the junior high basketball team on his first try, but instead of giving up worked harder and successfully made it the next year. He was always the first to arrive and the last one to leave during practice games. His advice to aspiring athletes : " When you find a wall, find a way to over it if you cannot go around it. I could understand people who fail but never the ones don't even want to try."
In my case, I learned to handle a loss the way a scientist do - each failure is just a lesson learned how not to do things the right way. My failure is my pain and I know I have to pay for the consequences. Conjugal mistake is another thing though, finger pointing won't help, and finding the reasons why at times is more like adding more fuel to the fire. The best way is she is falling from a cliff, and you jump in with her, and hold hands to meet whatever is down there together. There is no better way to grope in the dark when you someone to watch your back.
As the saying goes, marriage is the only gamble in which either both of you win or both of you losses. The best way to be treated like a king is to treat your woman like a queen. And for a man to be proved right, you have to accept that you are wrong, for its always either she is right, or you are wrong. And maybe, aside from the marital vows - for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, - the priest should also read the Miranda Rights to the groom, that every word he says can be used against him.
Years later, after his second retirement, he was asked how he saw his other losses and he smilingly said - they were not really losses, he just failed to knock them out. Foreman's second coming proved that you are not really a loser if you will just keep on trying. Either you come out swinging back to form or pause for a while as heal your wounds, and then recondition your self that the comeback road is a lot tougher than the first. He knew that ranged against younger and quicker opponents, he has has to double his effort, work harder and hurdle more pains in order to succeed.
Tom Hanks' role as Captain John Miller in the movie " Saving Private Ryan" summed up his losses by convincing himself that for every man he lost under his command, he was able to save some 20 or 25 of them. It was that way of thinking that allowed him to handle his own "private war."
Manny Pacquiao knew that he has to continue fighting the best in his division to be able to bounce back after getting knocked out cold by Torrecampo in 1996, and won his first world title 2 years later. But it was after his second KO loss that really boosted his career jumping 2 weight classes to win his second world title against Ledwaba. He did rested on his laurels, worked even harder, and established a record that would be hard to match winning world titles in 8 weight divisions. The big difference between him and most fighters is that he knew that getting beat up and losing is part of the game, and there is no shame in getting knocked out - for he was loved by boxing afficionados for going all out each time, taking chances, instead of fighting not to lose.
Michael Jordan failed to make the junior high basketball team on his first try, but instead of giving up worked harder and successfully made it the next year. He was always the first to arrive and the last one to leave during practice games. His advice to aspiring athletes : " When you find a wall, find a way to over it if you cannot go around it. I could understand people who fail but never the ones don't even want to try."
In my case, I learned to handle a loss the way a scientist do - each failure is just a lesson learned how not to do things the right way. My failure is my pain and I know I have to pay for the consequences. Conjugal mistake is another thing though, finger pointing won't help, and finding the reasons why at times is more like adding more fuel to the fire. The best way is she is falling from a cliff, and you jump in with her, and hold hands to meet whatever is down there together. There is no better way to grope in the dark when you someone to watch your back.
As the saying goes, marriage is the only gamble in which either both of you win or both of you losses. The best way to be treated like a king is to treat your woman like a queen. And for a man to be proved right, you have to accept that you are wrong, for its always either she is right, or you are wrong. And maybe, aside from the marital vows - for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, - the priest should also read the Miranda Rights to the groom, that every word he says can be used against him.
Friday, March 31, 2017
XXXVII. ZEN AND THE PARABLE OF THE TALENTS
"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, the only way, it does not exist." -- Friedrich Nietzhe
There was once a rich man who entrusted his property to three of his servants. The first one he gave 5 talents, the second one 3 talents, and the third one, 1 talent. The first one with 5 talents went trading and was able to make 5 talents more. The second one also traded and was able to make 3 talents more. The third one dug a hole in the ground and buried his one talent so it wouldn't be lost. When the master came home, he asked the three servants what they did with the talents he gave them. He was elated with the first 2 servants who were able to double the talents given to them but was greatly disappointed with the third one for not making good use of the 1 talent given to him. The third servant was vanished and even what he had was taken away from him. The first two were rewarded and told that they who have more will be given more.
Zen on the other hand is explained in a different way - " He who do not know cannot tell but he who knows do not tell." Its a paragon that describes a man's understanding that there is no conclusive way of defining the realities in life. Its like describing the taste of sugar to a 4 year old child. No amount of words can explain to him exactly how it feels. He must experience it. Given the kind of experience, it then becomes his burden to be able to explain it to the next child, and so forth. In our very own life, we too will have the desire to explain how we were able to go about some of its most interesting facets. However, we will forever be burdened with explaining to them how to do things better so as not for them to commit the same mistakes we've made.
The parable of the talents ... where does Zen come into the picture ? Its about experiencing how screwed up you went about wasting some good opportunities and have everything you've worked for taken away from you. You wanted to explain to everyone you know, especially those with whom you have close ties, but unable to do so. Most of them doesn't even want to listen, and those who do listen cannot understand how one so blessed with talents could fuck up things so bad, when a lot of good things are within arms reach for the taking. Life to some have become like travelling on the highway with a conked out sedan while every else are riding Benz and Limos and kept honking their horns since they are impending their path. Their faith in God will keep them from falling apart, get the courage and the strength to move on, and pick up the pace and try to continue the voyage. Zen, then allows you to navigate your way on your own "feeling" way, taking time to park at some places where you can admire and smell the flowers, smell the clean air, and dream a little, armed with the knowledge that all of us are bound for the same place, but able to touch more life as we go by.
Truly, those who made more from the talents given to them deserved more, but as long as life breaths inside you, you still have a chance. It is never wrong to be rich and famous, and powerful, as long as you earned them the righteous way - its how you about your wealth that make right things wrong. So as is being poor a more blessed path to salvation - its also about how you became poor and stayed poor through all your life. Maybe we can console our self with the saying that "money is not the key to happiness" but it is also true that with more many, you can afford to buy more keys. Religion can teach a man to become spiritual, but being religious is a lot different from being spiritual. Zen leads us to different path of enlightenment. Religion and Zen may never cross path but both agrees that life is good, and every man must do good for it is the payment or lease we have to pay for the space we occupy in this world.
Jesus said "Love one another as I have loved you". The Golden Rule states that we should not do unto others what we do not want to be done unto us. Every day, when the sun shines, we have an opportunity to do good, even when nobody notices, do good anyway, for Someone is always watching. Zen just adds color to these things, we "feel" the feeling of doing these things.
.
There was once a rich man who entrusted his property to three of his servants. The first one he gave 5 talents, the second one 3 talents, and the third one, 1 talent. The first one with 5 talents went trading and was able to make 5 talents more. The second one also traded and was able to make 3 talents more. The third one dug a hole in the ground and buried his one talent so it wouldn't be lost. When the master came home, he asked the three servants what they did with the talents he gave them. He was elated with the first 2 servants who were able to double the talents given to them but was greatly disappointed with the third one for not making good use of the 1 talent given to him. The third servant was vanished and even what he had was taken away from him. The first two were rewarded and told that they who have more will be given more.
Zen on the other hand is explained in a different way - " He who do not know cannot tell but he who knows do not tell." Its a paragon that describes a man's understanding that there is no conclusive way of defining the realities in life. Its like describing the taste of sugar to a 4 year old child. No amount of words can explain to him exactly how it feels. He must experience it. Given the kind of experience, it then becomes his burden to be able to explain it to the next child, and so forth. In our very own life, we too will have the desire to explain how we were able to go about some of its most interesting facets. However, we will forever be burdened with explaining to them how to do things better so as not for them to commit the same mistakes we've made.
The parable of the talents ... where does Zen come into the picture ? Its about experiencing how screwed up you went about wasting some good opportunities and have everything you've worked for taken away from you. You wanted to explain to everyone you know, especially those with whom you have close ties, but unable to do so. Most of them doesn't even want to listen, and those who do listen cannot understand how one so blessed with talents could fuck up things so bad, when a lot of good things are within arms reach for the taking. Life to some have become like travelling on the highway with a conked out sedan while every else are riding Benz and Limos and kept honking their horns since they are impending their path. Their faith in God will keep them from falling apart, get the courage and the strength to move on, and pick up the pace and try to continue the voyage. Zen, then allows you to navigate your way on your own "feeling" way, taking time to park at some places where you can admire and smell the flowers, smell the clean air, and dream a little, armed with the knowledge that all of us are bound for the same place, but able to touch more life as we go by.
Truly, those who made more from the talents given to them deserved more, but as long as life breaths inside you, you still have a chance. It is never wrong to be rich and famous, and powerful, as long as you earned them the righteous way - its how you about your wealth that make right things wrong. So as is being poor a more blessed path to salvation - its also about how you became poor and stayed poor through all your life. Maybe we can console our self with the saying that "money is not the key to happiness" but it is also true that with more many, you can afford to buy more keys. Religion can teach a man to become spiritual, but being religious is a lot different from being spiritual. Zen leads us to different path of enlightenment. Religion and Zen may never cross path but both agrees that life is good, and every man must do good for it is the payment or lease we have to pay for the space we occupy in this world.
Jesus said "Love one another as I have loved you". The Golden Rule states that we should not do unto others what we do not want to be done unto us. Every day, when the sun shines, we have an opportunity to do good, even when nobody notices, do good anyway, for Someone is always watching. Zen just adds color to these things, we "feel" the feeling of doing these things.
.
Monday, March 20, 2017
XXXVI. PHILOSOPHY ... GO WEST OR EAST ?
If you wanted success, fame and glory, go for western philosophy. Western philosophers fill the bookstores with thousands of titles sharing their supposedly secrets on how they were able to hack it. Be it success in life, business, leadership, or enterprise, or maybe a career in politics, mass media, or education, there are a large array of books that provide the tools to achieve them. On the contrary, oriental philosophy deals mainly with the multiple facets of the human soul, and emphasize more on one's search for serenity and enlightenment. Unlike western philosophy that readily opens up to debates and discussions, oriental philosophy centers more on the search, that it is best summed up in the lore that - "he who knows not cannot tell, but he who knows cannot tell." Like the taste of sugar, it can be explained in a lot of ways using words but it is only by experiencing it that could truly make one know its true taste.
Socrates, hailed in most history books, as "The Father of Philosophy" aimed to study the human things - the good life, justice, beauty, and virtue. He did not wrote anything but his able student Plato wrote most of the dialogues and poured in his own brand of philosophy about the immortality of the soul,the benefits of being just, that evil is ignorance, and the theory of forms. Aristotle, Plato's most outstanding student went farther as a systematic philosopher and scientist writing books on physics, biology, zoology, metaphysics, aesthetics, poetry, theater, music, rhetoric, politics, and logic. From then on , 300 B.C. until today, philosophers have filled in their own brand of philosophy, and it will never end ...
Ism - a suffix appended to different brand of philosophy. Marxism, Fascism, Existentialism, Feudalism, Maoism, the list goes on, and as long as people keeps on discovering new ideas the pursuit for knowledge will go on. Philosophy is defined as the study of the fundamental knowledge, reality, existence, especially when considered as an academic discipline. Sometimes, there is a mix-up between philosophy and religion but the two takes different paths that cannot cross. Religion is a particular system of faith and worship, but some preacher philosophies their beliefs.
For most people who seek gold, fame and glory, they go for western brand of philosophy. They like to believe that nothing is impossible if you just put your heart into it. There are no limit to what we can achieve if we are willing to work hard for it. People find success and always they are willing to share their so called secrets on how they were able to do it. But as many of these acclaimed success stories are, some despite the fame and money that goes with it wallowed in confusion on what to do with their "real" life. Some, are even driven to drinking, drugs and addiction. And at times, the realization that having fun is different from being happy comes in too late in their lives and they find it too late to go back.
I for one have read a lot of books on how to be successful in life but I never got to put them in practice. I have tried doing some of them at work but it ruined my days, dragged me to level with people that I am not comfortable to work with, and hated my self at the days end. I have a career wherein my signature could make a lot of difference to some people I work and deal with. I too have to blend with them, stay at par with them, and pretend not to see some things that are happening under my watch. But that is not me, so I decided to leave, and shifted to a career that better suited me. I have turned my life around, and though I was earning less than my contemporaries, I have relieved myself with the stress and tension that goes with my old job.
For my friends and some close relatives, it was a fatal mistake. I loss a good paying job, bungled my career, burned bridges, and cut my self off from people who could pull me up. But in a way, I became more at ease with my self. It welded me with my family for I got to spend more time with them. Days become less worrisome, and time passes me by unmindful of the other uncertainties that use to complicate our life. I got to do what I love to do, with people I love to be with, earn to make a living, and enlighten myself about a lot of things.
Socrates, hailed in most history books, as "The Father of Philosophy" aimed to study the human things - the good life, justice, beauty, and virtue. He did not wrote anything but his able student Plato wrote most of the dialogues and poured in his own brand of philosophy about the immortality of the soul,the benefits of being just, that evil is ignorance, and the theory of forms. Aristotle, Plato's most outstanding student went farther as a systematic philosopher and scientist writing books on physics, biology, zoology, metaphysics, aesthetics, poetry, theater, music, rhetoric, politics, and logic. From then on , 300 B.C. until today, philosophers have filled in their own brand of philosophy, and it will never end ...
Ism - a suffix appended to different brand of philosophy. Marxism, Fascism, Existentialism, Feudalism, Maoism, the list goes on, and as long as people keeps on discovering new ideas the pursuit for knowledge will go on. Philosophy is defined as the study of the fundamental knowledge, reality, existence, especially when considered as an academic discipline. Sometimes, there is a mix-up between philosophy and religion but the two takes different paths that cannot cross. Religion is a particular system of faith and worship, but some preacher philosophies their beliefs.
For most people who seek gold, fame and glory, they go for western brand of philosophy. They like to believe that nothing is impossible if you just put your heart into it. There are no limit to what we can achieve if we are willing to work hard for it. People find success and always they are willing to share their so called secrets on how they were able to do it. But as many of these acclaimed success stories are, some despite the fame and money that goes with it wallowed in confusion on what to do with their "real" life. Some, are even driven to drinking, drugs and addiction. And at times, the realization that having fun is different from being happy comes in too late in their lives and they find it too late to go back.
I for one have read a lot of books on how to be successful in life but I never got to put them in practice. I have tried doing some of them at work but it ruined my days, dragged me to level with people that I am not comfortable to work with, and hated my self at the days end. I have a career wherein my signature could make a lot of difference to some people I work and deal with. I too have to blend with them, stay at par with them, and pretend not to see some things that are happening under my watch. But that is not me, so I decided to leave, and shifted to a career that better suited me. I have turned my life around, and though I was earning less than my contemporaries, I have relieved myself with the stress and tension that goes with my old job.
For my friends and some close relatives, it was a fatal mistake. I loss a good paying job, bungled my career, burned bridges, and cut my self off from people who could pull me up. But in a way, I became more at ease with my self. It welded me with my family for I got to spend more time with them. Days become less worrisome, and time passes me by unmindful of the other uncertainties that use to complicate our life. I got to do what I love to do, with people I love to be with, earn to make a living, and enlighten myself about a lot of things.
Saturday, March 18, 2017
XXXV. IF IT DOESN'T KILL YOU, IT MAKES YOU STRONG !
I don't know where my friend got this quote but it was his favorite punchline. He was one of the best friend I've ever had. Never looking for a favor but always looking for some way to help. A former seminarian who gave up priesthood for love of a woman, he was one of the best computer specialist in the firm where I worked. He's one guy who really worked more than what he was being paid for, working on tasks assigned to him even after office hours and weekends without overtime pay. He's the shy type who allows other people to present his ideas as it was their own, but he didn't mind them getting the promoted ahead of him. He loved what he was doing, he earned more than what he needed money-wise, and he get to learn new things.
He prided himself of having to handle only the major decisions at home. The minor decisions like - what appliances to buy, where to enroll their kids, what to do with their earnings, or how to discipline the kids, - his wife took care of those things. Only the major ones, like in case of a nuclear war, where to hide, or if ever end of the world nears, which congregation to join, - will be left for him to decide. He seldom wash his car for he considered it his anti-carnapping device, and if his wife wanted a clean car, its another minor decision for her to decide to wash or keep it that way.
He thinks that the best way to teach the kids Mathematics was to give them different allowances, and chemistry by allowing them to make their own juice drinks and "baon" for school. The less rules he makes at home, the less rules to break, they were good parents so they will sire good kids. He doesn't bring home work, so home life is home life. At home, he is a father to his kids and a husband to his wife. A computer expert as he was, every home situation that requires attention can be programmed and debugged until the right outcome is derived.
When I resigned, I left everything behind including my friends. I seldom honor invitations, or return phone calls, until they got tired of trying to reach out. I knew I was at fault, but its the way I am, and I can't help being me most of the time. I have lost my taste for drinks, and found more comfort of being alone with my thoughts and my family. I have had a good run when I was with them at work, and I guess I was a good friend to them too. But there's something inside me that wanted to be left alone, detached from everyone except for my wife and kids, and my store where I am the kind of person I have always pretended to be.
Age is fast catching up with me, and travel wears me down. The last 20 years is but a routine, tending our bookstore 14 hours a day, 365 days a year. A life with no holidays, and that includes Christmas and New year, just movies and books to while my life away. On call for my kids at home any time, any day, with my wife to fill in my store hours, while I do some cooking and other personal things. That's one thing my kids will surely miss when I'm gone - my cooking and my stories - and maybe the things I wrote to remember me by.
I have no grand dream or anything, just lived a life I loved so much, loved my wife, loved my kids, treasured my friends and relatives, and thankful for all the things I learned that I got to share with everyone who were willing to listen. No regrets, no wishes unfulfilled, for how can I not be appreciative of a life that I enjoyed so much. It may not show in the things I have earned, but how can I ever describe the smiles I see each time I get to satisfy a book-lover who found in our store the book they have long been searching for. We readers speak a different language, be it romance, mystery or suspense, or any genre whatsoever, we're digging for gold.
He prided himself of having to handle only the major decisions at home. The minor decisions like - what appliances to buy, where to enroll their kids, what to do with their earnings, or how to discipline the kids, - his wife took care of those things. Only the major ones, like in case of a nuclear war, where to hide, or if ever end of the world nears, which congregation to join, - will be left for him to decide. He seldom wash his car for he considered it his anti-carnapping device, and if his wife wanted a clean car, its another minor decision for her to decide to wash or keep it that way.
He thinks that the best way to teach the kids Mathematics was to give them different allowances, and chemistry by allowing them to make their own juice drinks and "baon" for school. The less rules he makes at home, the less rules to break, they were good parents so they will sire good kids. He doesn't bring home work, so home life is home life. At home, he is a father to his kids and a husband to his wife. A computer expert as he was, every home situation that requires attention can be programmed and debugged until the right outcome is derived.
When I resigned, I left everything behind including my friends. I seldom honor invitations, or return phone calls, until they got tired of trying to reach out. I knew I was at fault, but its the way I am, and I can't help being me most of the time. I have lost my taste for drinks, and found more comfort of being alone with my thoughts and my family. I have had a good run when I was with them at work, and I guess I was a good friend to them too. But there's something inside me that wanted to be left alone, detached from everyone except for my wife and kids, and my store where I am the kind of person I have always pretended to be.
Age is fast catching up with me, and travel wears me down. The last 20 years is but a routine, tending our bookstore 14 hours a day, 365 days a year. A life with no holidays, and that includes Christmas and New year, just movies and books to while my life away. On call for my kids at home any time, any day, with my wife to fill in my store hours, while I do some cooking and other personal things. That's one thing my kids will surely miss when I'm gone - my cooking and my stories - and maybe the things I wrote to remember me by.
I have no grand dream or anything, just lived a life I loved so much, loved my wife, loved my kids, treasured my friends and relatives, and thankful for all the things I learned that I got to share with everyone who were willing to listen. No regrets, no wishes unfulfilled, for how can I not be appreciative of a life that I enjoyed so much. It may not show in the things I have earned, but how can I ever describe the smiles I see each time I get to satisfy a book-lover who found in our store the book they have long been searching for. We readers speak a different language, be it romance, mystery or suspense, or any genre whatsoever, we're digging for gold.
Thursday, March 16, 2017
XXXIV. NO SUCH THING AS FAILURE... AS LONG AS YOU KEEP ON TRYING
"You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call failure is not the falling down, but staying down."- quoted by Mary Pickford."
Considered as the "Queen of the movies, the most popular Canadian-American actress of the silent movie era (1910-1920), never wavered and won herself the second Academy Award for Best Actress for her first sound movie. She did not regain her popularity afterwards, mainly due to her age, but became one of the most influential figure in Hollywood partnering with Charlie Chaplin to produce their own films.
Its not easy to be looked down upon by people close to you, especially your own family. All of them have found financial security while I remained in the dumps. We did screw up some 20 years ago losing everything we've worked for, but since then we've never stopped trying. Though I appreciate every help I received, with 5 kids in tow, and not much profit earned from our business, we still have to make some sort of a headway. I could have opted for a different kind of business, one that rakes in more money, but that would mean abandoning a dream. The book business we started was more than just a livelihood for us, its the only thing I know that leave a mark, some kind of a legacy for my kids to remember me by, and something that had made my life useful for those who shared the same passion, wanting to open doors to find that "something" within them that too could provide them some answers they've been searching for.
Its kind'a hard to explain, that I am right in a place where I have always wanted to be. Maybe there are something we could "fix" in our life, like for example our lack of financial security. There are a lot of things money could buy, and sometimes its hard to keep happiness within one's home without food on the table. In a few more months, two more kids are about to graduate leaving only my youngest with 3 more years in college. Good paying jobs awaits my 2 kids so a great part of our financial needs will be met. But that's as far as I go - they have a life of their own, we've done our part, - then we can move on to "fix" the mess we made.
Maybe we were a bit late, unable to catch up for now but we are heading the same direction. Our vehicle were just a bit slow and we took some detours while on our way, but at least I can tell them that the travel have been worthwhile. It just so happen that I was driving, lost my way several times, but the drive have been interesting and I just like to leave a trail so others won't lose their way. Sorry for being a poor driver. All I can say is that even when I encountered a lot of bumps and flat tires, I never lost hope and I kept on going. And if ever I am not able to reach the right destination, I am sure my kids will take over.
The only good thing about being misunderstood is you get to understand yourself better. You know they meant well but somehow you have to distance yourself from them. Its hard to explain that we're just different ... We too like to go to where they are but have to travel via different route. We too like to communicate, but we are unsure of what to say and where to start. And we have to understand that sometimes some fruits fall far from the tree and end up some place else, but it doesn't mean that it would taste differently.
Time heals all wounds, seeds begin to sprout, become trees and then bear their own fruits. They may take roots in different grounds and different places, but they all can be traced from the same origin.
Considered as the "Queen of the movies, the most popular Canadian-American actress of the silent movie era (1910-1920), never wavered and won herself the second Academy Award for Best Actress for her first sound movie. She did not regain her popularity afterwards, mainly due to her age, but became one of the most influential figure in Hollywood partnering with Charlie Chaplin to produce their own films.
Its not easy to be looked down upon by people close to you, especially your own family. All of them have found financial security while I remained in the dumps. We did screw up some 20 years ago losing everything we've worked for, but since then we've never stopped trying. Though I appreciate every help I received, with 5 kids in tow, and not much profit earned from our business, we still have to make some sort of a headway. I could have opted for a different kind of business, one that rakes in more money, but that would mean abandoning a dream. The book business we started was more than just a livelihood for us, its the only thing I know that leave a mark, some kind of a legacy for my kids to remember me by, and something that had made my life useful for those who shared the same passion, wanting to open doors to find that "something" within them that too could provide them some answers they've been searching for.
Its kind'a hard to explain, that I am right in a place where I have always wanted to be. Maybe there are something we could "fix" in our life, like for example our lack of financial security. There are a lot of things money could buy, and sometimes its hard to keep happiness within one's home without food on the table. In a few more months, two more kids are about to graduate leaving only my youngest with 3 more years in college. Good paying jobs awaits my 2 kids so a great part of our financial needs will be met. But that's as far as I go - they have a life of their own, we've done our part, - then we can move on to "fix" the mess we made.
Maybe we were a bit late, unable to catch up for now but we are heading the same direction. Our vehicle were just a bit slow and we took some detours while on our way, but at least I can tell them that the travel have been worthwhile. It just so happen that I was driving, lost my way several times, but the drive have been interesting and I just like to leave a trail so others won't lose their way. Sorry for being a poor driver. All I can say is that even when I encountered a lot of bumps and flat tires, I never lost hope and I kept on going. And if ever I am not able to reach the right destination, I am sure my kids will take over.
The only good thing about being misunderstood is you get to understand yourself better. You know they meant well but somehow you have to distance yourself from them. Its hard to explain that we're just different ... We too like to go to where they are but have to travel via different route. We too like to communicate, but we are unsure of what to say and where to start. And we have to understand that sometimes some fruits fall far from the tree and end up some place else, but it doesn't mean that it would taste differently.
Time heals all wounds, seeds begin to sprout, become trees and then bear their own fruits. They may take roots in different grounds and different places, but they all can be traced from the same origin.
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